Bucked Off For Love: A Bull Rider Novella Read online

  “You did, but we should see each other for a bit before you get to know him. Just in case.”

  “Just in case what?”

  She pushed up on her elbows. “It doesn’t work out. This is new, we don’t know the future.”

  “I do. It includes you, me, Shiloh, and a few more rug rats.”

  She stared at me with concern. “You want kids, with me?”

  “Yes, several of them. You’ll come live here and…”

  “Let me stop you right there. You’re getting way ahead of yourself.” She sat up and moved away from me. “It’s just been Shiloh and me for years. I haven’t even thought about another child in forever. When he was young I wanted another, but it never worked out. Now, I don’t know if I want to do the whole diapers and midnight feeding thing again.”

  She was off the bed, finding the rest of her discarded clothes. This time I couldn’t stop her, no matter how hard I’d tried because I’d freaked her out. Hell, I freaked myself out. Why the fuck was I bringing up kids after I’d just slept with her? If a woman had done that to me, I’d be running too.

  “I’m sorry, I said too much. It happens with you. I can’t think straight around you. I don’t understand it.”

  She tugged her jeans on. “I like you and want to see where this goes, just be slow with me.”

  “You mean we shouldn’t start planning the wedding?” I’d said it joking, but her face paled. “I’m kidding.”

  “Yeah, that. Don’t do that. I told you last night, I don’t have much experience with men and relationships. What I do know about from my time with men is sex—when I used to have it.”

  “You’re amazing at sex. Want to do it again?”

  She laughed as she sat on my computer chair to slip her boots on. “No, but I do need you to give me a ride back to my car at the barn. I hope no one is down there for my walk of shame.”

  Probably just Tank, one of the helpers at the ranch, but he wouldn’t care. “All right, let me get dressed and I suppose I’ll take you back to your car, as long as you promise I can see you again soon.”

  I hopped off the bed and came toward her in all my naked glory. Taking her in my arms, she said, “Promise, but my idea of soon and yours might be different.”

  “Stop making this so complicated.” I kissed her, tired of her always having a comeback. We were meant to be as far as I was concerned and the sooner she accepted it, the better.

  Chapter 13

  Cassidy

  I’d been home for a few hours since leaving Ryder’s. My mind going a mile a minute. I’d showered, thrown in a load of laundry, and now I scrubbed down my kitchen so I could spend the rest of the day baking. My craving for chocolate was on high demand and I needed cookies, muffins, maybe even a cake but first I had to get all the dishes done and put away all the items I’d left lying around.

  Never in a million years had I expected Ryder to tell me he wanted kids with me. When I’d met him, he came off as a player. He knew he was sexy and women wanted him. Hell, they probably flocked for him, but I’d shown no interest and yet, he wanted me. Ugh, I wanted him too. My feelings for him had exploded in a way I didn’t intend. He’d been someone who annoyed me and hurt my feelings and now, I could see the future he suggested.

  When Shiloh had been two, I’d wanted another baby. It wasn’t until three years ago when love just wasn’t happening that I realized that another child would never happen. Even now, my son was ten. Did I want to go back to diapers, bottles, temper-tantrums, all that stuff? Only with Ryder I wouldn’t be alone, he’d be there to help.

  I shook my head, needing to stop thinking about it. All of it. This man had come into my life and messed everything up.

  “We’re here!” Beth’s voice echoed through the small house.

  “In the kitchen.”

  Beth came in with Taylor and Shiloh. He gave me a quick side hug then he and Taylor wandered off toward his bedroom. It seemed like they were getting along the way they used to.

  “So.” Beth leaned against the counter. “I texted you, like, ten times and you never responded.”

  “My phone’s in my room. I’m avoiding it.”

  “Why?”

  I rinsed off the pan I’d been scrubbing then set it on a towel to dry. “I needed some time to think.”

  “I can see. Your kitchen is almost sparkling. I take it last night didn’t go well.”

  “It went good.”

  Her eyes lit up. “So what’s the problem?”

  “He wants a future.”

  “Uh and that’s bad, how?”

  I sighed dramatically as I said, “Because.”

  “Because why. Don’t start on this because he’s a bull rider crap.”

  “I wasn’t but you brought up a good point.”

  “He’s retiring.”

  I stuck my tongue out at her as I dried my hands. “All right, in all seriousness now. I can see being with him in the long run. As much as I want to deny it, the connection is there. When I’m not with him, I’m thinking about him. But it’s fast for me.”

  “Sometimes fast is good.”

  “I have Shiloh to think about. I don’t want him getting hurt.”

  “He’s a strong young man. He’d want his mom to be happy. Besides, Ryder might be a good influence on him. Aside from you, who does Shiloh have?”

  “You.”

  “And I’m another woman. He needs someone to guy talk with as he gets older.”

  I didn’t even want to think about that. My son was on the verge of those hormone years. Was Ryder the man I wanted Shiloh to look up to?

  He seemed to have good family values. I’d spoken with his parents a few times in town and liked them. If, and a big if it was, we lived on the ranch, Shiloh would learn about hard work. He was addicted to video games and I wanted more for him and helping on the ranch would teach him some valuable lessons in life.

  “I’m just confused. I didn’t expect to have sex with him and the next morning he would be talking about babies.”

  “You did it?” she whispered.

  “Yes,” I squealed.

  “Oh my God, how was it?”

  “I don’t want to kiss and tell, but…it was fantastic.”

  Beth clapped her hands then covered her mouth. “I’m so happy for you. This is something you deserve and it’s about time it’s happening for you.”

  “Oh God, now you’ve got us walking down the aisle.”

  “Just make sure my maid of honor dress isn’t tacky. I’m thinking a hunter green to go with your hair.”

  “You’re wearing it, why does it have to match my hair.”

  “Because your dress is going to be white but with a green ribbon around the center.”

  I stopped for a moment and let myself imagine it. I wanted a sleeveless gown with a flowing skirt. A green ribbon would fit perfectly around my waist and maybe even a necklace with a dark green stone. And for flowers, we’d do red roses. Oh, maybe a wedding around Christmas.

  Whoa. That was enough of that. “Anyway, how were the kids last night?”

  She put a hand on her hip. “Is that what you want to talk about?”

  “I want to talk about any other topic that doesn’t involve me, Ryder, and a wedding.”

  She scrunched her nose. “You’re no fun.”

  “And don’t you forget it.” I glanced around. “Time to start baking. Want to help?”

  “As long as I get to be the taste tester.”

  “Deal.”

  Hopefully the batter would shut her mouth and she wouldn’t bring up Ryder again.

  ***

  I loved Sunday mornings. Saturday’s Shiloh and I usually slept in, but on Sunday, I set my alarm early and made a big breakfast for us. We enjoyed it together on the back screened in porch and then he usually disappeared back into the house to have his video game day. I let him have free reign on Sunday during the school year because come Monday, he’d back to learning. And now a days, it seemed like the kids j
ust worked so much harder. I swore the things he learned, I didn’t learn until high school.

  I was on my third cup of coffee already, still in my lounging pants and tank on the porch. For some reason, I wanted to be in this spot all day. A certain bull rider had been on my mind and I was a little bothered I hadn’t heard from him. Sure, it had been yesterday that I’d seen him, but after sex, I’d expected at least a text. Then again, we’d left things a little awkward. That whole kid and marriage talk. Maybe he was embarrassed. If so, I couldn’t blame him. I’d be too. But still, I was disappointed not to hear from him.

  I drained my coffee cup, wondering if I should get a fourth or stop before I was so wired, I’d have to take a run or something. Setting the mug down on a side table, I leaned back in the chair, closing my eyes, the sun warming my skin. I loved living here in this small town. Even if I had come from the city of Miami with hustle and bustle, there was just something peaceful about this place. It was homey and I felt like I knew most of the people and they’d be around to help if ever needed.

  The screened door creaked open. “Mom.”

  “Yup.”

  “There are two men here to see you.”

  I sat straight. “Who?”

  “That fellow we saw the other day at the grocery store and someone else.”

  “I need to get dressed.” I started to stand, but froze. Ryder was behind Shiloh.

  I’d have a talk with him later about just letting people into our home. Though, Ryder wasn’t just anyone and maybe he thought it was okay. And well, maybe it was, but I wasn’t dressed.

  “Uh, hey,” I said, sitting back down.

  Shiloh disappeared and Ryder and his friend came onto the porch with me, both tall, large and filling the space in a way only a man could. Mystery guy had a seat in a chair and Ryder came over, planting a kiss on my lips. It caused a shiver to rock through me before he stepped away and sat down in another chair.

  “Morning,” he said. “This is my friend Rob.”

  “Pleasure to meet you,” Rob said. “I’ve heard a lot about you.”

  I almost said, good I hope, but didn’t. “So what brings you by unannounced?”

  “Rob’s sister is bringing her kids out to the ranch today to ride and I wanted to see if you and Shiloh wanted to join.”

  “You could have called.”

  He grinned. “Could have, but I thought you’d have a harder time saying no to my face than over the phone. Plus I asked Shiloh already and he said yes.”

  I stood. “Will you excuse us a moment, Rob?”

  He nodded.

  I glared at Ryder. “Follow me inside, please.”

  He did and as soon as we were inside, he wrapped his arms around me, tugging me tight to him. His happiness to see me pressed into my stomach. Normally I’d be happy to, but my son was right down the hall.

  “I didn’t ask you in here to touch.”

  “No? Then why?” He kissed my bare shoulder and I sighed, finding it hard to stay upset with him.

  Pushing him away, I managed to speak. “Listen, that isn’t cool asking my son something without discussing it with me first.”

  “You’re mad about that? I didn’t know it would be an issue.”

  “It is.”

  He released me. “I overstepped, sorry. I’ve never been a parent and didn’t stop to think what I did was wrong. You’re right. I guess if you had other plans then I just kinda screwed that up. But he seemed excited.”

  Why did he have to be so darn cute when apologizing? And why the hell did my anger just melt away? Agh! “We don’t have anything going on, and if Shiloh wants to do it, then I suppose it’s something we can do.”

  His face lit up like a kid on Christmas. “My mom makes an awesome Sunday meal. Rob and his sister and her kids are going. So, uh, would you and Shiloh?”

  “I don’t want to impose. That’s already so many people to cook for.”

  “Yes, but she’s the one who suggested it.”

  “Well, then yes.”

  He brought me back into his arms, crushing his mouth to mine. Unable to resist, I laced my arms around his neck, getting as close to him as I could. It was insane how much this one man could change my emotions so quick. I was someone who could hold a grudge until the end of time, but Ryder broke down my walls, showing me a brand new side to myself I never thought I’d find. No man had ever opened these emotions in my heart.

  Pulling back, he said, “I want to kiss you all day, but I need to take Rob back to the ranch and get ready for our fun day ahead. Come over about noon. We’ll ride for a bit and then mom has her Sunday meal made around 2:30.”

  “Sounds good. I’m going to go shower and get ready. Tell Rob I’ll see him in a bit.”

  Ryder kissed me once more then laughed. “You weren’t kidding when you said you kept a messy house.”

  “Can you still see a future with me?”

  “I’ll just have to pay my cleaning lady double.” He slapped my ass then went to the back porch.

  I hurried to my bedroom, shutting the door, but not before leaning against it and letting out a long moan.

  The idea of a future with Ryder was getting a lot more appealing as seconds ticked by.

  Chapter 14

  Ryder

  “You saddle up Penny. I got Mason.” I went toward the horse, handing him a carrot from my pocket.

  “Cassidy seemed nice,” Rob said as he carried riding equipment toward Penny.

  “Seems? She’s feisty.”

  “I gathered that. Thought she was going to blow a gasket the way she glared at you just showing up.”

  “She didn’t care for that.” I laughed, loving that I had the ability to infuriate her then make her weak in the knees.

  “You’re serious about her though.”

  “Very much. Didn’t think this day would come, but it did.”

  Rob put the saddle on Penny then worked the straps. “I’m not ready anytime soon.”

  “Yeah well, neither was I, but this darn shoulder injury changed my course.”

  “Speaking of. You seem to be getting around well. Feeling better?”

  “I still gotta ice it some, but yeah. I’m hoping in the next week or two I can ride again.”

  “Sure it’s a good idea. One fall could be serious.”

  I tipped my hat up. “One fall was serious, remember? My last season came to a premature ending. All I want to do is ride one last time. One last chance to sit on the back, feeling the beast jerk me around as I try to beat the buzzer. The thrill of getting away from the bull before he turns on me.”

  “I get it.” Rob patted my shoulder. “Totally do. I got a few more seasons.”

  “Lucky you.” I checked my phone. “All the kids should be here soon. Maybe we should get another horse out since your sister has two.”

  “Nah, Gracie isn’t old enough. Penny and Mason are fine. Think Cassidy’s son will be interested.”

  I shrugged. “Not sure, he might be. It would be awesome if he liked it and bulls. Probably make Cassidy’s head spin though.”

  Rob nodded with smile. “I get your serious about her, but is she you?”

  “I sure as heck hope so, but I don’t know. Maybe you can tell me what you see.”

  Two cars came down the dirt road toward the barn.

  “It’s like they planned it.” Rob chuckled and we headed out of the pasture toward the vehicles.

  I wanted to kiss Cassidy again, but she probably wouldn’t like that in front of her son. She wanted to wait to tell him anything until she knew we were going to work out and I could respect that, didn’t mean I liked having to hide how I felt. The boy wasn’t stupid, he’d figure it out in no time.

  I opened Cassidy’s door and took her hand to help her out. She gave me a flirty smile that made my cock twitch. She was dressed in tight skinny jeans, boots, and a tank. Her usual attire. I liked that she didn’t go out of her way to fancy herself up. Personally, a woman who was causal appealed to me a wh
ole more than one in a designer dress and five inch stilettos. Didn’t mean I didn’t ever want to see Cassidy in some fuck me heels.

  “Hey Shiloh,” I said as he climbed out of the car and came to stand next to his mom.

  He gave me a stern look, almost as though he was protecting Cassidy. I’d win him over. He agreed to come today.

  “We saddled up two horses.”

  Rob came over with his sister Wendy and her two kids Jake and Gracie. Jake was around Shiloh’s age, so maybe they’d hit it off and I could get some one-on-one time with Cassidy.

  We took the kids over to the horses. Rob took the lead with the kids, which was good. I didn’t know a whole lot about children. Shiloh came to my shoulder and to be honest, it intimidated me a bit. I hadn’t stopped to think about how much my coming into their lives would affect him. And shit, I needed to figure out if this is really what I wanted before I got attached to them both and vice versa.

  “Let me help,” Cassidy said as Rob lead Shiloh over to Penny.

  “I got it,” I said, wanting to be the one to take initiative.

  There was a strong need inside me to show her I could be the man. The one to teach her son the ways of life. I couldn’t quite pinpoint what the feeling was and why I had them, but something was kicking in inside me.

  “Rob, when you’re done, bring the stool over here.” I turned to Shiloh. “It will be easier and best if you learn to do it without a lot of help.”

  “This is his first time.” Cassidy moved closer to her son and I could see she was nervous.

  “He’ll be okay.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “I’m gonna do my best to make sure.”

  Wendy brought the stool over, Gracie on her hip. I smiled at her then placed it down.

  “All right, put the foot you’re keeping on this side of the horse in the stirrup, then pull up and swing your other leg over. Make sense?”

  “Yeah.”

  Shiloh did as I said, but got stuck trying to pull himself on. Placing my hands on his lower back, I gave him a push and he was able to bring himself over and up onto the horse.